League Roast

Commissioner's Reserve

Commissioner's Reserve

Whole-bean fantasy fuel, roasted to order and shipped with a side of trash talk.

$24.00

12 oz · whole bean or ground

Choose your grind

1

Free shipping over $40

Roasted to order

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The Story

Flex

This blend was made specifically for the person running this circus. You wrote the rules, you enforce the rules, and somehow you're still the villain of the group chat. Arguments that grown adults shouldn't be having? All handled. Will the power corrupt you? Obviously. Nobody appreciates you. This coffee does.

Tastes Like

Notes of raw power, unpaid dues, and quietly simmering resentment.

Nutritional Facts

Per Season · Values Not Guaranteed

“I’m Busy That Weekend” Texts

14

People Who Still Haven’t Paid

9

Disputes Settled

47

Arguments Grown Adults Shouldn’t Have

All Handled

Thank-Yous Received

0

Will The Power Corrupt You

Obviously

* Trash-talk content may exceed the recommended daily intake.

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