Love / Hate
Whole-bean fantasy fuel, roasted to order and shipped with a side of trash talk.
$24.00
12 oz · whole bean or ground
Choose your grind
1
Free shipping over $40
Roasted to order
The Story
Ritual
On Monday he is the sleeper who will win your league. By Thursday he is dead to you. Both opinions are researched. Both are delivered with complete confidence. A perfectly balanced roast for the analyst in all of us: half victory lap, half permanent Week 3 grudge, and fully prepared to delete the original ranking.
Coffee Profile
TASTING NOTES — Rich praline sweetness. Smooth body. Perfectly balanced. Medium Roast · Sourced from Brazil, Colombia & Guatemala TASTES LIKE — A SLEEPER HIT · A BUST TICKET · TWO TAKES AT ONCE SMACK METER — 2/5 · Side-Eye
Free Shipping
On all orders over $40. Because you\’ve already paid enough in waiver bids.
Championship Guarantee
We can\’t guarantee you\’ll win. But we guarantee this coffee won\’t be the reason you lose.
Nutrition Facts
Per Season · Values Not Guaranteed
Smack Meter
2/5 — Side-Eye
Players Loved
Before Kickoff
Players Hated
By Halftime
Takes Issued
Two Per Player
Receipts Deleted
Strategically
Confidence Remaining
Unchanged
* Trash-talk content may exceed the recommended daily intake.
Keep the roster stocked
