Mr. Auto-Draft
Whole-bean fantasy fuel, roasted to order and shipped with a side of trash talk.
$24.00
12 oz · whole bean or ground
Choose your grind
1
Free shipping over $40
Roasted to order
The Story
Shame
You set a reminder. You ignored the reminder. The algorithm drafted your team and, somehow, it's not the worst roster in the league. Made for the manager who trusts the machine more than himself — low effort, surprisingly balanced, works better than it has any right to.
Coffee Profile
TASTING NOTES — Bakers chocolate. Caramelized sugar. Deep, velvety body. Dark Roast · South American blend TASTES LIKE — Chaotic, Unplanned, Burnt
Free Shipping
On all orders over $40. Because you\’ve already paid enough in waiver bids.
Championship Guarantee
We can\’t guarantee you\’ll win. But we guarantee this coffee won\’t be the reason you lose.
Nutrition Facts
Per Season · Values Not Guaranteed
Smack Meter
3/5 — PERSONAL FOUL
Alarms Missed
All Of Them
Picks Made By Algorithm
Every Single One
Sleeper Busts Drafted
A Few
Apologies Owed
To The League
Will Do It Again
Probably
* Trash-talk content may exceed the recommended daily intake.
Keep the roster stocked
