One Title. Shut The Fuck Up.
Whole-bean fantasy fuel, roasted to order and shipped with a side of trash talk.
$24.00
12 oz · whole bean or ground
Choose your grind
1
Free shipping over $40
Roasted to order
The Story
Flex
You won once. One time. Yet every waiver claim, trade, and unrelated dinner conversation now begins with 'as the reigning champion.' Dark, velvety coffee for the title holder turning one trophy into a permanent personality disorder.
Coffee Profile
TASTING NOTES — Bakers chocolate. Caramelized sugar. Deep, velvety body. Dark Roast · South American Blend TASTES LIKE — ONE TROPHY · TWELVE MONTHS OF NOISE · EVERYONE ELSE'S EYE ROLL SMACK METER — 5/5 · League-Ending
Free Shipping
On all orders over $40. Because you\’ve already paid enough in waiver bids.
Championship Guarantee
We can\’t guarantee you\’ll win. But we guarantee this coffee won\’t be the reason you lose.
Nutrition Facts
Per Season · Values Not Guaranteed
Smack Meter
5/5 — League-Ending
Titles Won
1
Times Mentioned
Daily
Unrelated Chats Hijacked
All
Humility Displayed
0
Will Shut Up
No
* Trash-talk content may exceed the recommended daily intake.
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