Set It And Forget It
Whole-bean fantasy fuel, roasted to order and shipped with a side of trash talk.
$24.00
12 oz · whole bean or ground
Choose your grind
1
Free shipping over $40
Roasted to order
The Story
Shame
You set your starters in Week 1 and never opened the app again. Somehow you're still in playoff contention. Nobody knows how. Made for the manager running on pure vibes and zero effort. Bright, easy, and inexplicably still working.
Coffee Profile
TASTING NOTES — Bakers chocolate. Caramelized sugar. Deep, velvety body. Dark Roast · South American blend TASTES LIKE — Stone Cold, Abandoned, Left Behind
Free Shipping
On all orders over $40. Because you\’ve already paid enough in waiver bids.
Championship Guarantee
We can\’t guarantee you\’ll win. But we guarantee this coffee won\’t be the reason you lose.
Nutrition Facts
Per Season · Values Not Guaranteed
Smack Meter
2/5 — SIDE-EYE
Lineup Changes Made
One
Notifications Ignored
All Season
Naps Taken
Instead
Standings Position
Confusingly Good
Effort Level
Minimal
* Trash-talk content may exceed the recommended daily intake.
Keep the roster stocked
