Stupid Trade, Jackass.
Whole-bean fantasy fuel, roasted to order and shipped with a side of trash talk.
$24.00
12 oz · whole bean or ground
Choose your grind
1
Free shipping over $40
Roasted to order
The Story
Shame
You traded a weekly starter for a bench stash and a paragraph about upside. Then you asked the group chat to let it play out. It played out. You got fleeced, the screenshots are permanent, and this dark roast is the only fair return you are getting.
Coffee Profile
TASTING NOTES — Bittersweet chocolate. Toasty. Bold and full-bodied. French Roast (Dark) · Sourced from Brazil TASTES LIKE — A ONE-SIDED DEAL · BUYER'S REMORSE · THE WHOLE CHAT TYPING SMACK METER — 5/5 · League-Ending
Free Shipping
On all orders over $40. Because you\’ve already paid enough in waiver bids.
Championship Guarantee
We can\’t guarantee you\’ll win. But we guarantee this coffee won\’t be the reason you lose.
Nutrition Facts
Per Season · Values Not Guaranteed
Smack Meter
5/5 — League-Ending
Trade Value Lost
All Of It
Paragraphs Defending It
6
Managers Who Approved
Just You
Receipts Saved
Forever
Lesson Learned
Absolutely Not
* Trash-talk content may exceed the recommended daily intake.
Keep the roster stocked
